41 On Caring

Beloved Tara,

You say caring is hurting.
There is another way to see caring.
You can see it as a basic human condition.
When you do not care, you are no longer human.
Thus caring is something you do for your benefit, and not for the benefit of others.

But when you care, you can care in a way that is selfish, or you can care in a way that is mutually beneficial.
The former will satisfy your lower, ego-based need to "feel caring", but it will not satisfy your higher needs for union.
The higher way, caring from the point of view of truly addressing the need of the other, and not your mere perception of what is right, is something that will lead to a spiritual union between yourself and the other person.
This is called compassion.

It is where your caring is not something where your charity lets you put yourself up and the other person down.
It is not something that forces them to take what you give.
Instead, real compassion is a kind of sharing, not of charity but of friendship.
It puts people on an equal level.
And it is a recognition that helping the other is helping yourself.